Will You Adults Stop Your Whining and Just Manage Children’s Behaviour Properly!
Written by Liz Marsden on December 11th, 2009 in Self Development.
I can feel a super rant coming on… A little boy’s just started in my class and his behaviour in school is totally dreadful! He’s been allowed to behave like this for years and he’s just had his 8th birthday. Its astounding! Perhaps I shouldn’t be shocked – I deal with cases like this time after time. It’s part of my job of managing the behaviour of children who are so out of control that their next step is to be thrown out of school for good.
Anyway, this little guy’s behaviour is very bad…
The rant isn’t about this little boy…. No, he’s not the problem as he’ll be fine before we know it…
My rant is about the adults in his school, and in so many other schools, who’ve allowed this situation to arise in the first place. Adults are useless, hopeless, awful…
So, what have some of the adults from his school done? They’ve written to a higher authority than the head teacher, complaining about this little kid. I can just imagine the tone of the letters, ‘He does this, he does that, we can’t do this, we’ve tried that, whinge whinge, whine, whine, moan, moan, etc, etc,’
And what result do they want? I haven’t a clue but I guess they’d rather he disappeared from their school and got offloaded somewhere else!
Hey, Liz, isn’t it fair that they should complain about his behaviour? No, I don’t think it’s fair! How’s that? I keep repeating myself in every workshop sessions, lecture and school visit – children’s behaviour’s an adult issue. Yes, there is appalling behaviour all around but the reason for it is that the adults aren’t managing it properly!
Adults have to accept that they are responsible for children’s behaviour – and those in this boy’s school have allowed him to deteriorate to this point. Whingeing and whining about a situation that adults in general have allowed to get worse and worse, isn’t going to have any beneficial impact, is it?
What’s the reason for the bad behaviour? Well, many children know that they can behave appallingly and not a great deal happens as a result. When adults’ only recourse is to send whining letters of condemnation to a higher authority is doesn’t say much for adults taking responsibility…
The only way children’s behaviour will change is if adults evaluate their own behaviour and make some changes to themselves. They won’t see any alterations in children’s behaviour unless this happens.
So, get a grip. If you don’t know what to do then learn what to do. It’s not difficult. Put your money where your mouth is and start doing what adults should do. Manage kids!!
Ok, my ranting’s done for now!
Liz Marsden is a widely experienced and successful children’s behaviour management specialist. She uses her expertise to train teachers, students and parents to manage children’sren’s challenging behaviour. Visit Liz’s website where you can access her widely recommended book and learn about her behaviour management techniques that are seen to work time after time.
